The only constant in life is change. Why, then, do we tend to resist it so muchespecially as we grow older? While in my 30s (a long, long time ago), I realized that I would probably have a difficult time accepting change as I proceeded into the Autumn of my life. Fortunately, I was able to recognize that constancy was more comfortable than change but that change would occur whether I welcomed it or not. And so, I began to introduce some fun type, little training exercises that forced me to change for my future. Also, I began learning and practicing relaxation response exercises as an added feature to help ease the pain of changing..

Some examples were on my walks, I would never take the same route in two consecutive days and I would vary my walking speed purposely. I changed my morning routinee.g. combed my hair (I had hair then) before I brushed my teeth or place my shaving routine into a different order every morning. These artificial methods of inducing change seemed to have worked for me. Not that change is easy for me to accept but easier than I believe it wouldve been had I not consciously made those attempts.

They say that the more we try to control, the more we lose control. Thats because if the controls are unnatural, they will create more problems than help. In teaching thousands of people how to relax and let go I would help them understand that in order to gain control, we must first learn how to lose control. Thats not just double talk because the feeling of true relaxation of our mind and body is an unforgettable experience. Enjoy!

Charles Bonasera

Charles M. Bonasera had been a practicing psychotherapist since 1962 and has served as a Consultant, Mediator, Author and Workshop Presenter since 2003. Based on years of extensive research he became a Stress Management expert and founded/ directed the Stress Management Center which evaluated and treated stress-related problems. As President of Personal Identity Controls, he developed and produced a number of interactive materials on various stress-related topics to enable people to take greater control their lives.Charles produced the CD/workbook entitled ?Guide To A Life Management Process? which helps people recognize and manage their stress more effectively. His Workshops and consultations with businesses, corporations and schools, stresses the recognition that our greatest resource is people and treating them with dignity and respect promotes productivity. His role as a keynote speaker mixes his professional wisdom with practical solutions and a sense of humor.

Based on his previous experience as an evaluator of learning disabilities, he began rendering Workshops to school districts in 1995. His goal was to help educators recognize the importance of incorporating principles of mental health in the classroom. His Workshop and Consulting roles dealt with issues such as anger and stress management, developing reasonable expectations, belligerent behavior, case study workshops, parent-teacher relationships, reducing anxiety to facilitate the learning process, problem solving techniques and the practical components of healthy, happy relationships. Many of these same topics were incorporated into general audience workshops as well.

Charles? methods center around helping people develop ?alternative ways to happiness.? His problem-solving techniques are practical and interactive enabling people to make their own choices in their own individual style and time-frame.. His approach clearly embodies the philosophy that ?the greatest learning we experience is when we don?t know we?re learning and are having fun? and that learning is both an intellectual and emotional process.