Are you a nice guy? Do you find dating to be a challenge because girls think of you as a friend or a brother? Do you wonder why all the women you want, seem to go out with guys who are thought of as "bad boys?"

If you answered yes to any of the above, you might ask yourself, what exactly do those bad boys have that you don't have? For starters, they are probably confident. Confidence can make you very attractive, and you don't have to act like a bad boy to have it and show it. Here are some of the qualities that a nice guy can adopt that will make you more compelling to women and you won't have to compromise any of your values.

The way to confidence for a nice guy is through some of the following:

Accomplishment

What are you good at? Find your skill or your talents and shine them up. Nothing is as attractive as an accomplished person. Finding this talent is not meant to be difficult. There is something that you are naturally gifted at that you probably take for granted. What do you do in your spare time? What do people come to you for? What comes easy to you but other people might find it hard if not impossible? Somewhere in the answer to those questions you may find what you can be proud of.

Finances

Ahhh...here is the tricky one for most men. It is true that women are attracted to rich men, but more than that, they love guys with a sense of humor, a deep set of values, and a great, promising career. When you add that to the basic attitude of confidence, it is unbeatable. If your finances are meager, don't try and hide the fact that you must live on a budget. But can you be inventive with your ideas for dates? Women love a sense of mystery and imagination.

Humor

If you can see the funny bone in most situations, and you have the above qualities, you are irresistible. If you find that you laugh very little during your day, it is advisable that you find some movies you consider funny and watch those, along with TV shows that make you smile. Turn off the depressing news and lighten up by watching some humor.

Career

If you have a great career, or if you are taking the action steps to attain one, you will be attractive to women. If you are confused and don't know what to do with your life, get yourself a coach or guidance counselor, get some job training, and get busy. When you are doing what you love to do; when you can take care of yourself financially; and when you have a plan for your future and you are implementing it, you will be the kind of guy women are looking for.

Looking good

You need to look good and smell good. Women like clean nails and hair; suits, slacks and shirts rather than jeans and Tees; and women love good shoes. It's one of the first things they notice. Have a plan for getting to the gym at least 5 times a week or another work out schedule that keeps you in shape.

Pull your spaces together

Is your living environment a pig sty? Does your car look like a trash can? It's time to clean it up, organize your things, and make a space for the woman of your dreams. You can't meet someone until you've room for her.

You get to keep being a nice guy. You are just going to be a nice guy with confidence. If you do the above, you will feel terrific and you will become attractive to women. Nice guys don't have to finish last.

Tonja Weimer

Tonja Evetts Weimer is a Master Certified singles relationship and life coach, speaker, syndicated columnist and author.

Tonja is a full time professional coach with a practice in Greenville, SC. She helps individuals, especially singles, re-craft their lives and find happiness and success in their career and relationships. Some of Tonja's professional activities include:

==> Syndicated singles relationship columnist, writing SAVVY DATING, a weekly column read by over a million readers in many U.S newspapers. Tonja's column addresses relationship and life issues of interest to all adults, but particularly to the over 110 million singles in the U.S. Tonja has also had articles published in New Woman, Hope, and House Beautiful magazines, and has won 3 Matrix Awards for her writing.

==> Motivational speaker, Tonja has been a keynote presenter at national and international conferences over the last 30 years.

==> Author of materials for educators and parents (7 books, six music albums and 2 videos), which have won 22 awards.

Some Speaking and Media Highlights:

==> Keynote speaker for 2004 Women?s Issues Network Conference, Sumter, SC.

==> Keynote speaker for 2002 Parents as Teachers International Conference, St. Louis, MO.

==> Keynote speaker for 1999 International Conference for Children & Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder.

==> Keynote speaker for 1998 European Education Conference, in Mannheim, Germany.

==> Keynote speaker in 35 U.S. states at educational conferences.

==> Presenter at the International Special Olympics in Notre Dame, at the request of Eunice Kennedy Shriver.

==> Created Space Songs for Children, at the request of NASA (album taken into space by astronauts three times.)

==> Appeared on CNN?s Showbiz Today and many other TV shows.

Educational and Professional Qualifications:

==> National Fellow (U.S. Dept. of Education.) M.A. in Human Development and Education, with an emphasis on creativity.

==> Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach, Relationship Coaching Institute.

==> Personal Life Coach, Graduate, Institute for Life Coach Training.

==> Member, International Coaching Federation